Bathing a Cat at Midnight

What could be more fun than bathing a cat at midnight?  Almost anything let me tell you. 

My poor sweet cute baby cat Sassifrass has become even more inquisitive in the past few months.  She has found the joy of sitting on top of my refrigerator.  She has managed to learn how to open cabinet doors.  And Monday night she managed to get into the garage by pulling open a poorly shut door.  When I walked in I knew the door hadn't shut all the way and I thought I kicked it closed.  I was in a hurry as I REALLY needed to pee.  I threw all my stuff on the floor and rushed into the bathroom.  Apparently I had not shut the door all the way.  I spent the evening sitting on my computer reading e-books and playing on Facebook.  At one point I hear a door squeaking, and thought she was trying to get into the pantry, but I didn't see her so I just blew it off.  Then as I was getting ready to go upstairs, I realized I was hearing the squeaking again.   I followed the noise directly to the slightly open garage door.  Upon opening the door, there sat my Sassi.  Once I'd picked her up, I realized she must have climbed on the tire and/or tried to get into the undercarriage of my Jeep, because she had grease stains on her feet and she had black streaks all over her WHITE fur.  She also smelled like rubber.  I really didn't want her to clean all of that off herself.  I glanced at the clock 12:05 AM.  Oh well, I thought guess I'm not getting to bed any time soon. 

I went upstairs, Sassi in tow, walked into the bathroom and shut the door.  Sassi didn't start to get worried until I turned on the water in the tub.  She looked a me horrified for a second and started to struggle.  I kept the water fairly warm, as I know cats have a higher body temp then humans, and I didn't want her to get cold.  Two inches of water later, Sassi was starting to moan and grip tightly to my jammie top. (sounds a bit like a porn movie doesn't it)  Anyway I get her into the water and like any other respectable cat she does her best to get out.  I'm leaning over the bath with my belly resting on the edge.  Trying to keep at least half of her in the water. I didn't have any cat shampoo, so I used the unscented hand soap I used to wash my hands.  I managed to get the grease off her paws, but by that point she's managed to crawl into my shirt. She's making this constant deeply distressing moaning cry.  I really can't take much more of it, and I know she's at her wits end.   So I make sure I got most of the dirt off of her.  Only to realize that I forgot to grab a towel.  Not that it really matters as I'm waterlogged myself.  I take her out of the water, trying to squeeze as much water out of her fur.  I grab a towel and go sit on the bed with her. 

I wrap her up as best as I can and start drying her.  Sassi takes it stoically until I get to her belly.  She is pretty much done with me and starts to growl.  If you've ever met her you would realize that she is very much not a growler or a hiss-er, she purrs, and meows and chirps at me but hardly ever growls, not even at Chai or the outside cat that harasses them through the sliding doors on the patio.  She still pretty wet, but I go ahead and let her go.  I was pretty sure she'd shoot off like a rocket, but she sits on the bed glaring at me.  I use the edge of the towel and continue to try to dry her off.  I want her to stay in bed so she'll keep warm.  So I go get her favorite toy and bring it to bed. I know, she's a cat, an indoor cat at that, but I couldn't help it.  She's one of my babies.  She'd been highly stressed and if she'd gotten any water in her lungs (I tried to keep her head dry - didn't work with all of the flailing) she could get sick. 

I convince her to curl up on my feet and she starts to finish drying herself off.  It's after 1 now and I'm pooped.  It doesn't take much for me to drop off.  Next morning she's still curled up on my feet.  I was worried I might get the cold shoulder but she ended up sleeping on my lap for about 45 minutes before I had to go to work that morning.  She's still a bit leery of the bathroom but she peeks in to see what's going on.  She will forever be a curious one.